The New Phoenixville Leek

"Pictured, Senator Toomey describes in detail how it's possible for him to pee on his own balls..."

National Leek - Joe Biden hires pompous, verbally abusive second cousin as practice partner in preparation for 1st Presidential debate Ronnie Matussi, Biden's 6...8 year old second cousin from Hazleton, Pa is not a seasoned debater, but he has been involved in innumerable arguments, and subsequent physical altercations at almost every bar in Luzerne County. "Biden picked the perfect guy" says Nick Sadatta, owner of Sadatta's Tavern, Matussi's neighborhood bar. "He's in here all the time, shooting off his mouth, bragging and just flat out lying about anything and everything. Like when tells everyone he owns a Ferrari, but we all know he's been driving the same Pontiac Fiero since the mid 90's." Matussi has been sued in court 17 times, claimed bankruptcy 3 times and absolutely hates immigrants, despite the fact that his own grandparents immigrated to the US from Italy. "If Joe can win an argument and manage not to get punched in the face by Ronnie, he'll have no problem with Trump." added Sadatta. (Matussi is pictured watching the door, waiting for someone to argue with)

Hope you wore a hat today...

This is exactly why we make it a point never to hire anyone from Mont Clare...

Breaking Leek - Smoke up, Johnny!

More Leek News from the Net -

Leek News from the Net - "As many as 550 people may have been exposed to COVID-19 at a Toronto strip club last week after they forgot boobies can be found on the internet, from the safety of one's home."

Breaking Leek - Phoenixville creates map of public pissing pandemic...

Sadly, the truck did not create any new parking spaces...

Breaking Leek - Spring City attempts to out-class Boyertown. And, well...

Leek Exclusive - Another first for Phoenixville - "Crime Lanes" In anticipation of a new rail line with only direct connections to Reading and Philadelphia, some forward thinking borough leaders applied for a grant which would cover the cost to study installation of "crime lanes", a first ever in the United States. "These lanes would connect the new, proposed rail station with area parking lots for petty theft, as well as some more upscale neighborhoods around town and allow ...criminals quick and easy access in and out of Phoenixville via the proposed rail line" said grant writer, Rod Strokar. If approved and built, the rail line is expected to be a hot mess.

Breaking Leek - Downtown parking spaces increased by .000001%